Saturday, June 26, 2010

Back on top in June. Thats life.

Its June! Otherwise known as LGBT Pride Month. I've been wondering what LGBT pride month means to me.

First, how did I feel about homosexuality before I knew I was a lesbian? I never thought about being gay. Every time I even thought about the term "gay" I would immediately think of something else. I didn't want to have the thought in my head even for a minute, let alone relate to it. I assumed once you decided you were queer, you switched teams. If you were a woman before, you became a man and vice versa. I didn't want to be a man. I was manly enough! Every time I tried to do something girly it was almost laughable. I tried carrying a purse in high school and never heard the end of it. Being girly was just something that I felt like I never figured out. I felt like I missed the day we learned that in school. Ironically, when I admitted to myself that I was gay, I had never felt more like a woman.

I'm a lesbian. I AM A LESBIAN, and up until I knew I was a lesbian I was wrong about lesbians. How can straight people know any better? By talking about it! Thats what LGBT pride month is to me. It's a time to say "I'm gay" but to follow that up with a little info. I told both of my parents how I felt like a woman when I came out, and they both didn't really know what to say to that. It doesn't matter if they can make a conversation out of it. I just wanted to give them some insight into what I experienced. I thought all lesbians were manly, definitely not feminine. Is it wrong for me to think they might have the same thoughts? Surely my insight is better than the information they've been getting from...? No where!

I was the PE teachers assistant in high school (shocker). I sat through four years of public school sexual education and not once did they discuss homosexuality. Keeping homosexuality on the down low does nothing but create and spread fear of "the unknown". Think of all that fear thats keeps LGBT people locked up in themselves. It breaks my heart to know that the part of me that makes me the happiest, is the part that gets ignored by kids, parents, educators, and politicians who are afraid of what THEY THINK it means. Based on our history of keeping homo on the down low, I'm assuming their notions are the same notions passed down from their grandfather, and his grandfather before him.

LGBT pride month, for me, is a time to be vocal. Listen, I know lesbians have pride, don't just say you're proud- tell them why!

Here are 5 reasons I'm proud to be a lesbian!

This should be enough of a reason to be lesbian. Men are horrible at communicating. Women might communicate too much... Still, I'd rather be talking about the problem and working toward a solution then stuck at step one wondering what the problem even is. That is why I never leave an argument unresolved, if possible.

Confident women are the best women. Work those heels! Head up, honey! Get that promotion! Ace that test! Belt that song! Get scrappy! There's a look (and I know you've seen it) when you can tell that a woman means business. It usually involves the eyebrows.

Guys would be really pissed if they knew we actually had these. Pillow fights followed by wrestling, hair pulling, leg tangling, and kissing. We have it all.

I tried to think of a joke about how men define romance- but I guess that is the joke. Women are just better at it. We like to be romantic as much as we like to be romanced. It works out pretty nicely.

I never thought about my wedding until I came out. I always found a boyfriend and dumped them before two weeks had gone by. I went long periods without dating and I was perfectly fine with it. Now, I think about my future wife and smile. I can't wait to meet her. I can't wait to dance with her, hold her tight, make her smile, and do everything she needs me to. I'm gonna be the best wife ever, ladies. *With the exception of my future wife*